A woman climbed onto a bus and sat down near a man, accidentally hitting him with a dirty and heavy bag. Surprisingly, the man didn’t complain or show any ill feelings. When the man remained silent, the woman asked him why he didn’t complain when she hit him with her bags. The man replied with a smile, saying there’s no need to be upset about something so insignificant as our journey together is so short because he will be getting off at the next bus stop.
Everyone on the bus was stunned by the man’s response, and I believe there’s a valuable lesson in this for everyone. Each of us must understand that our time in this world is so short that filling it with useless arguments, jealousy, unforgiveness, discontentment, and bad attitudes is a waste of time and energy.
Has someone broken your heart? Stay calm because the journey is too short to let it lead you into depression. Has someone betrayed, intimidated, disdained, hated, tongue lashed, cheated, or humiliated you? Relax! Don’t stress yourself unnecessarily because the journey is too short. Has someone insulted or denigrated you without reason? Stay calm, ignore it. The journey is too short. Has someone made a comment you didn’t like? Stay calm, ignore it, forgive, and continue to love them. Because the journey is too short. The truth about life is that whatever problem someone brings to us is only a problem if we perceive it as one. Instead of viewing it as a problem, always remember that our journey together is too short.
Unfortunately, no one knows the duration of the journey together. Nobody knows when they will reach their final destination (“breathed their last breath” or “died).” Therefore, the only true reality is that our journey is too short. Let us continually appreciate our friends, families, spouse, parents/guardians, co-workers, classmates/coursemates, colleagues, subordinates, and neighbours. Treat them with kindness, respect, and good humour. Let us be respectful, kind, loving, and forgiving so that we can experience gratitude and joy. After all, our journey together is very short. This is a valuable lesson on the true reality of life. Let us love, tolerate, and accommodate each other, and avoid anger, bitterness, and taking advantage of one another.
It was a bittersweet moment of glory, pomp, and pageantry, mixed with heavy sadness and uncontrollable collective cries among his classmates at the recent (2024) convocation ceremony of a Nigerian university. He had been the top student in his class (Department of Physiotherapy), but when his name was called to collect his well-deserved award and meritorious reward, his classmates and friends spontaneously burst into tears to mourn his shocking and premature demise. After spending a rigorous and painstaking seven years plus in medical school to become a brilliant and intelligent doctor, he tragically died in a car accident just a few weeks before his graduation. The point is, every day of our lives is a memorial; let’s cherish it together and live by forgiving one another.
No matter the prejudices, resentments, disharmony, disagreements, past conflicts, and hurts you and your biological mother may have, that’s not a reason to continue dishonouring and somewhat punishing her. Without any apology, mothers are invaluable treasures. Give your parents the highest form of honour. You are not living in love when you dishonour your parents or hold grudges against them, regardless of the gravity of past hurts or pains. Forgive them regardless.
The Power Of Forgiveness
The bitterness that many individuals, including family members, are nursing and holding unrepentantly and stubbornly against each other is unbelievably toxic and acidic.
Forgiveness may be one of the hardest things to do, but it is a necessary step for healing and freedom. Holding on to grudges or pain often hurts you more than the person who wronged you. Choosing forgiveness is not about justifying the wrong but freeing yourself from the emotional burden.
Consider the story of a man whose business partner betrayed him by stealing funds. Initially, anger and bitterness consumed him, but after much reflection, he forgave the partner. This act of forgiveness gave him peace and allowed him to focus on rebuilding his business. Without forgiveness, he would have remained trapped in resentment.
Similarly, a mother forgave a drunk driver who caused her son’s death. While the pain remained, forgiveness freed her from hatred and allowed her to advocate for road safety in her son’s honour. Forgiveness is not easy, but it opens the door to emotional freedom and growth.
Forgiveness also fosters personal growth, emotional healing, and a sense of inner peace. It does not erase the pain but transforms it into strength. By forgiving, you reclaim your power and refuse to let past hurts dictate your future.
Another example is a woman who faced years of verbal abuse from a close friend. Instead of harbouring anger, she chose to forgive and distance herself from the toxic relationship. Forgiveness allowed her to focus on nurturing healthier connections and healing her self-esteem. Without it, she would have remained stuck in bitterness, unable to move forward.
Ultimately, forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. It allows you to release the emotional weight of hurt and make room for joy, peace, and new opportunities. Regardless of the pain or betrayal, choosing to forgive is a testament to your strength and resilience—a step toward a better, more fulfilling life.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting or allowing wrongdoing to persist. It is a deliberate choice to let go of anger and resentment, giving yourself the freedom to live without being shackled by past hurts. When you forgive, you are not condoning the actions of others but taking control of your emotional well-being.
For instance, Nelson Mandela forgave those who imprisoned him for 27 years. Instead of seeking revenge, he chose to embrace reconciliation, focusing on rebuilding South Africa. His forgiveness became a powerful example of how letting go of bitterness can lead to collective healing and progress.
In another case, a sibling forgave her brother for years of neglect during childhood. Although it was difficult, her forgiveness rebuilt their relationship and allowed them to reconnect as adults. Forgiveness is a bridge from pain to peace. By forgiving, you choose love and growth over resentment, creating a brighter path for yourself and others.
A significant percentage of wives globally are in abusive and strained relationships and are victims of ongoing domestic violence. If domestic violence continues, it may be wise to consider a separation and seek quality third-party interventions to help resolve the issues between the couple while also forgiving your aggressive spouse.
When Love Is Absent
The absence of love among siblings often leads to rivalry, disharmony, and unhealthy competition, causing lasting emotional damage. Jealousy and resentment thrive in an environment devoid of love and mutual respect, resulting in ongoing conflict.
For example, parental favouritism towards one sibling can create feelings of neglect and competition among the others, straining relationships into adulthood. In another scenario, two brothers failed to cooperate in a family business due to unresolved childhood issues, leading to destructive competition and business failure.
Love fosters harmony, understanding, and support among siblings, preventing rivalry and nurturing lasting bonds. By cultivating love, empathy, and open communication, families can promote collective success and happiness.
Growing up without love and mutual respect can lead siblings to view each other as competitors rather than allies, fostering a cycle of comparison and bitterness. For instance, a sister may feel overshadowed by her successful brother, leading to rivalry and resentment.
Parents can play a crucial role in fostering love among siblings by encouraging collaboration, highlighting individual strengths, and teaching empathy. Building a foundation of love strengthens sibling bonds, enabling them to support each other through life’s challenges and joys.
Addressing Unhealthy Competition Among Employees
Unhealthy competition among employees can harm productivity, innovation, and team cohesion in the workplace. Prioritising personal gain over collaboration leads to mistrust, lack of teamwork, and a focus on outperforming others rather than achieving shared goals.
For example, in a marketing team, two colleagues competing for a promotion refused to share crucial data, resulting in project failure. In a corporate setting, a senior professional spread false rumours to undermine a colleague, creating tension and reducing morale.
Organisations thrive when employees work together. Encouraging teamwork, recognizing collective efforts, and fostering an inclusive culture can mitigate rivalry and boost productivity.
Leaders play a crucial role in addressing unhealthy competition by promoting transparency, fairness, and open communication. Implementing team-based performance reviews can motivate employees to support each other and achieve better outcomes.
For instance, in a software development firm, shifting the focus to group milestones and rewarding teamwork accelerated project delivery and enhanced innovation.
Unhealthy competition hinders productivity, raises stress levels, and results in job dissatisfaction and higher turnover rates. Building a workplace culture that celebrates diversity, encourages mutual respect, and aligns everyone toward a common vision ensures long-term success. Achieving workplace excellence involves prioritising collective growth over individual competition, fostering a thriving and productive environment. Let’s make the most of our time together!